Sunday, December 28, 2008

The 250th Dream I Had

Warning: this isn't made up. If it were, I would have had the women on roller skates . . .

I got some flannel pajamas for Christmas. So I tested them out, naturally. I have vivid dreams, but the dream I had a few nights ago can only be described as well, maybe you can find the words.

Picture this. Luke wants to film a commercial about Pittsburgh's 250th anniversary to promote tourism and our heritage. The backdrop is the Heinz History Museum. From a second story window, a huge stiff yellow ribbon holds about 60 of Pittsburgh's most famous faces--Ben Roethlisberger; Franco Harris; Luke, his wife Erin, and their baby; Mr. Rogers and his wife, Joanne; August Wilson; Andrew Carnegie and a dinosaur; David Johnson and Peggy Finnegan, all on the ribbon and all smiling.

The camera pans through the window and into the building. . . there is light smoke everywhere and as it begins to lift, it reveals a rollerskating rink. Women wearing red sequined dresses and sporting giant fluffy aqua-net hair begin float out and dance sexily. The backs of their dresses are open, showing off sparkly see-through panties and bras while the disco ball rotates around the rink. In hushed voices, they whispered to each other, "Cherry McDonald is coming."

Finally, a curtain opens and out comes Andy Warhol and when he turns around, he's also Ronald McDonald, hence the name, "Cherry McDonald." He dances around for a bit with the women and at the end in a finale, they all pose together.

If Luke should take my dream idea and use it to promote Pittsburgh, I want royalties.

Lady Elaine


  1. oh i'd PAY to see it!

    i had a dream years ago about rats in tux and some in fucia high heels. think we could work that in there?? ; )

  2. I like the idea of the women floating rather than skating, (women skating's been done before.)

    What I want to know is how does this stiff ribbon hold all of these faces? And why're Johnson & Finnegan the only news anchors on the ribbon, no love for 'TAE & KD?

  3. LOVE the rats! Hell yeah!

    WPXI is my fav because of their "Severe Weather Center" and "Breaking News." Although I watch the other news channels, I find myself gravitating to WPXI. Call me a sadist.

  4. i want dee thompson with his hat and scarf!

    i hope he never retires.